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雅思写作大作文范文分析-动物园的意义

来源:新航道 浏览:0 发布日期:2017-08-08 14:08

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题目:

Some people think that zoos are all cruel and should be closed down. Others however believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion

翻译:有些人认为动物园很残忍,应该被关闭。但也有人认为动物园在保护野生动物方面是有用的。讨论双方并给出自己的看法。
话题:社会类-动物保护
类型:双边讨论类

分析:这道动物园的题目是真题,且往年考过多次,在野生动物保护热议的今天,雅思复考后,也很有可能出现,建议大家提前做好准备。

拿到这个题目,我们首先审题,在审题时要格外注意,题目中的限制性信息。比如,请大家思考:若这个题目两个主体段,一段写动物园的好处,一段写动物园的弊端,对不对?

不完全正确,如果泛泛的讨论动物园的advantages  & disadvantages 很有可能会跑题,因为这一题目中,好处这一边明确的为大家规定了:Others however believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals.

这就叫限制性信息,限制大家在写好处时,一定要围绕着保护野生动物这一点进行讨论,不要去说其它的好处。这一点请大家一定要注意,否则会偏题哦。

同样的,在动物园讨论弊端时,其实大家也需要注意,题目中说道:zoos are all cruel and should be closed down.

有cruel这个词,也就意味着我们所以关于弊端的探讨都应围绕着动物园怎么残忍了去讨论,而不应该写如:去动物园的很多都是小孩,小孩可能会误伸手进老虎的围栏里而有危险这样的点,这样就又偏题了。

好,说完审题的注意事项,咱们再来看看构思:

Animal welfare is a growing concern in today's society. 在西方国家,更是有很多游说群体(lobby groups – 雅思阅读中出现过的词汇) 劝导大众保护动物。在雅思主办方British Council自己的英语学习网站中,其实就曾经就这一话题进行过一些讨论,大橘给大家整理一些观点,大家可以借鉴。

首先我们来看看,支持动物园残忍的点:

点1:侵犯动物权利

It is cruel to remove animals from their natural habitat(自然栖息地) and keep them in cages(笼子) for the public to look at.

It is a breach(违背) of an animal's natural rights to take it into captivity(囚禁) and thus deprive (剥夺)it of the ability to carry out its evolutionarily established social and instinctual behaviors.

点2:动物可能会不适应环境

An animal kept in a zoo will lead a different life to an animal that lives in the wild,for example zoos feature(以…为特色)animals from places all over the world and animals must therefore adjust to different climates and seasons, depending on the location of the zoo in relation to where the animal comes from.

(动物园的动物来自世界各地,很多动物不一定适应当地气候季节)

点3:动物在动物园中活动空间实在有限 (点2和3可以归纳为动物会suffer-危害健康)

Animals are inevitably(不可避免的) confined(限制,紧闭) in enclosures(围场,封闭空间) far smaller than their native habitats, and that this is detrimental(有害的) to their health and well being.

动物园可以保护野生动物的点:

点1:动物园可以为野生动物提供更好的医疗条件:

Hard-working zoologists understand the needs of wild animals and provide the right food and care for them. When a wild animal gets sick, these experts know what treatments and medicines to give them in order to help them get better.

点2:动物园会开展一些保护野生动物的项目

Conservation is another way in which zoos help wild animals and the environment. Many have specific programs or centres that work to preserve and protect endangered species.

点3:外面也很危险:

Due to threats such as poaching(非法捕猎), there are arguably many species which would be extinct if they weren't kept in zoos.

所以我们看到动物园如果能提供很好的环境,能够根据不同野生动物的生活习性为它们提供合理的生活环境,不必和天敌竞争,也不必忍痛挨饿的野生动物也许可以活的更长更好。最后给大家一句来自RealClear Science的话:“Natural” isn't always better for an animal's health. The natural world can be a very cruel one indeed.

All right, Let’s 看精选范文吧(范文更倾向于于关闭动物园)

范文:

Zoos remain popular places for people to visit for entertainment and to learn about wild animals(看,开头句就强有力的点题,告诉考官,我看到wild animals这个关键词了). Although some people are of the opinion that zoos can provide a sanctuary(名词:避难所) for endangered animals and so should be kept open, I believe that the cruelty(点题) that animals suffer outweighs this benefit, and that they should be shut down.

(两句话:引入话题+引出观点,大家看双边讨论型文章开头就特别适合让步状语从句,Although 反方是这么认为的(双边中的一方), 我不同意我的观点是(双边中另外一方))

These days, animals are under threat from(承受来自…的威胁) humans in many ways(地道表达), seen for example in the way that their habitats are being destroyed through the cutting down of rain forests, or through poaching.(这个句子的句型值得学习哦,Nowadays, xxx怎么样了in many ways, seen for example in the way that +支撑观点的例子) Following on from this, the argument is that zoos can protect some of these animals that are under threat. The reason is that they are in a safe environment managed by trained staff who can ensure the animals are looked after and can produce offspring (注意句子的构成,包含了很多元素:分词修饰,定从修饰以及并列-你自己写句子时可参照模仿,融入多元素- 句子并不长,但语法成分多,分数一定不低且不会造成阅读障碍,太长的句子容易造成理解困难,不要过度追求长难句). There are examples of successes in this respect, such as with Pandas(非常好,还具体举例了), which have been endangered for many years but have been protected.

(即便作者的观点是应该关停,但作为双边讨论的文章必不可少的,依然要把双边观点都充分议论道,切不可指讨论己方观点)

However, there are more convincing arguments(好搭配,记下来,在你的文章中用起来) for why zoos should be shut down. Firstly, even though some species are under threat(回应上一段), there are lots of animals which do not fall into this category and who are there just for the entertainment of visitors. While it may be fun and educational to see them, animals are not meant to be caged, and their distress can often be seen in the way many of them pace back and forwards all day(此处指动物成天在动物园里走来走去,展现出一种焦虑感…). Not only this, if the prime reason(主要原因,好搭配记下来) of zoos is to protect animals, this could be done in other environments such as wild life parks where the animals have more freedom.

(作者自己方的观点-有一些动物并不面临着失去生活家园或被捕杀,他们被带到动物园,完全是为了取悦大众)

In conclusion, animals should be protected but this does not have to be in zoos. Zoos are cruel to animals, not similar enough to(和…并不相似) their natural habitat, and they should be closed down.

(结尾段:重申观点,扣题)

好啦,以上就是咱们今天的题目解析及范文分析哦,希望大家都能从中得到启发。

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